May 23, 2012

Humming Peacefully

Oh the flow of it all. The way it seems to come right when the intention is right and the way it seems to crumble beyond what you thought was dust when you go in without integrity. Lessons learned and ways changed and the road gets a little smoother. Or does it? As endurance junkies, we do just learn to endure the pain?

Do we take the abilities we have earned / learned / yearned from our time on the open road into the areas where they do simply not belong? So often I see athletes taking the ability to suffer into their relationships, seeing how long they can endure abuse, how many years they can go without really making the commitment.

I have been there. I wore that t-shirt out years ago. Now, I am not the person who endures. I thrive, I learn, I adapt, I throw caution to the wind and have learned to love without borders, to share without walls and earn respect the old fashioned way, by doing.

It requires compound thought patterns and many decisions, good decisions, to get there. These decisions include eating patterns, sleeping patterns, compromising on learned western pleasures and diving into the pool without knowing how deep it is or feeling the temperature with your toes.

With guiltless abandon we have to fly into the night where risk is not feared but enjoyed with your inner child. We have to go blindly, absurdly into the abyss where all our best ideas lie but where we have been taught to tread lightly. Stomp the ground and dig out the best ones I say!

The magic doesn’t happen in your comfort zone.

The truly amazing moments are earned, not given.

Sure, I’m humming.

My hair has gotten thick again, My skin has its elasticity back. I have picked up weight to the point of looking normal again. For four months, I went deep. I didn’t realise how deep until about a week ago. I threw it all in the pot. I never even came close to a comfort zone. My poor co-inhabitant-better-half. I hope she saw through the haze that I was and that what I discovered up there benefits both our lives moving forward.

Sure, I’m humming.

It’s been a while since I felt this peaceful. Time to let that feeling ebb and flow for a little. Letting the energy that comes from it find me and source the next opportunities around me, the ones with the right integrity and right honour behind them. Right now, I am soaring. Soon, it’ll be time to let the wings do the work again. But for now….

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